The long, long distance parenting…
So living with the choices you make is not always easy but when you have a plan and a greater goal in mind, it has its rewards.
Being a dad is one thing but being a dad oceans away is a challenge to say the least.
However, my husband finds a way to always keep in touch, never missing a moment.
Good morning vidoes on skype. A good morning sms on my cellphone. We do not own an alarm clock because he wakes us up and makes a follow up call to make certain we not late.
Runs through my itenary for the day and recaps on our business chats the night before.
If anyone of the above does not happen i would definitly worry.
And yes there are times he travels to places where there is no internet or limited internet but i know he will find a way to contact us.
Oh i am going to be telling stories on this topic…
Once he was in a jungle and he had walked miles out of camp to get a signal and he did it for days and late at night. Really made me feel so special even though i worried like crazy.
After daycare dad skypes baby and they have a long conversation.
I am always with a baby in one hand and a tablet in the other. Often i catch myself saying ‘bring dad along’ referring to the tablet
Whether its cooking, washing dishes or having a bath, dad is always singing to Baby while she reads him a few stories as only a two year old can.
I selfishly leave the two to chat and I get some alone time until baby figures out i am not in the room.
Nivesh is an exceptionally understanding dad.
Bed time routine is dad singing in the bath, Mum reading a story, baby demanding that we all pray on our knees then comes quiet time with dad on skype and baby drinking breast milk whilst mum just sits in awe of what a beautiful family she is blessed with.
Baby nauturally doses off and then my work starts again. Hubby and I go through our businesses, branches then staff by name and finally we get some alone time.
We never put skype off at night. We love skype, it truely is a treasure that we hold dear to us.
P.S. the reason why all of the above is remarkable is because our life depends on the country Nivesh travels to, the time zones we subjected to and the hours he is obligated to and yet still making time for us as a family braving sleep deprivation, supper at 1 am and staying awake the entire night and day then night again just to hear the words
i reached safely
and then to reply
I love you
Steps to help deal with distant parenting:
1. Reassure your children you will still be connected with them. (Talk about the forthcoming work trip and the so called exciting ways we will keep in touch)
2. Give your child immediate proof of your connection with him or her. (A phone call at departure then on arrival)
3. The day after Nivesh travels i always buy Kiara something small and say ‘dad sent this for you, you so blessed and don’t forget to say thank you to dad’
4. I always put reminders on Nivesh’s cellphone for the following week or weeks depending on the length of the trip. Just letting him know we love him and missing him with kisses. It is cheap and quick.
5. Never miss a day without keeping in touch. Thank God we live in a technology advanced society that we can pre-record messages. Make the time, believe me it is worth it. If Nivesh does not have the time to send a video then i will use the previous days recording.
6. I often buy greeting cards on special to put in Nivesh’s travel bag. When we were dating i even wrote little poems just to say i care.
7. After a long trip, we have to readjust to each other. We often just stay at home, watching movies and playing games eating all Nivesh’s favorite food. Then we celebrate all the things we missed doing together and so we get a redo. How many people can say that?
8. I know how difficult it is to make time to take videos and pictures especially when you alone with a kid or kids but keepsakes are oh so special. Your child will need it as he or she gets older.
9. Create a personal website. So many free sites so start creating memories. We all need to know where we come from, to know where we going.
10. Appreciating the time we have together and valuing the memories we make together. Thanking God every step of the way.
I would love our family to explore new ways of distant communication. Any thoughts?